#feeling stupidly emotional over him today 🥺

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

🌟 happy birthday alex turner 🌟

thank you for sharing the vivid, beautiful, strange and evocative creations of your mind with the world. you have the rare ability to evoke with words things that are more than words, and the dexterity to allow your music continually morph and evolve while retaining such a distinctive and unique integrity. your creativity is a continual solace and a joy and an inspiration to so many people. miles kane truly said it best: you are a little diamond 💎

[rucow]

watching a therapy session with one of my favourite artists has left me in shambles oh.. ohhh... ohhhg my godd......😭😭😭

[phr3ia]

Love Game (Toji Fushiguro x Fem!Reader) [Chapter 08 : Emotions]

(SMS)

You: Hey Suguru, I'm on my way home from work. Just walking🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️... Gotta burn those extra calories!

Suguru: Oh, great! I hope it's not too hot out there.

You : Not really. A bit windy, which helps. How about you? Did you finish some of your missions today?

Suguru : Yes, I did! And now I'm enjoying the city views from my hotel room. It's quite relaxing.

You : Sounds nice. Do they have good views where you're staying?

Suguru : They do! You can see the whole city of Shibuya from here. It's breathtaking, especially during the night.

You : I bet. I miss watching the city from afar sometimes.

Suguru : You should come by when you're free. We can have dinner or something 🙃.

Suguru : I know it's sudden and maybe it's a bit forward of me to invite you over for dinner. But I feel like we could use some catching up 😅.

You : Hahaha! No worries, it's not forward. Considering we're friends, it's only natural for me to visit 😁...

Suguru : Deal then! How about next week?

You :  Works fine for me! Text me the address, and I'll find my way there 😎...

Suguru : Alright. Will do. Looking forward to seeing you 🥺.

You : Same 😊...I'll chat with you later tonight after dinner.

Suguru : Sounds good. Have a nice evening!

You : Likewise, Suguru..

(End)

The warmth of knowing that Suguru was still in your life gave you a sense of comfort, a feeling you hadn't experienced in quite some time.

As you approached the apartment, you noticed Toji leaning against his car, flirting with a woman. She laughed at something he said, and you couldn't help but roll your eyes at them.

Toji spotted you, and his attention shifted from the woman to you. He cocked an eyebrow, noticing the smile on your face as you typed away on your phone. "Hey, what's got you grinning like a fool?"

Annoyed by his intrusion, you tucked your phone into your pocket, glaring at him. "None of your business."

Toji shrugged, then pushed the woman away, causing her to stumble back.

"Why are you stupidly smiling on your goddamn phone?" he asked, joining you as you unlocked the door to the apartment.

"Just mind your own damn business, Toji." You snapped, marching inside.

"Come on, Buttercup. You've got to tell me. You never smile like that." Toji said, following you close from behind.

You shook your head, heading straight to the kitchen. "Like I said, it's none of your concern."

Toji leaned against the counter, crossing his arms. "I'm your roommate. I'm supposed to know everything about you."

"Excuse me? That's not how it works! Well, tough luck for you. This is one secret you won't pry out of me." You shot back as you walked towards your bedroom.

"Aww, are you keeping secrets from me now?" he teased, a mock hurt look on his face. "Fine. I'll let it slide this time." Toji said, moving away from the counter.

But you knew it wouldn't be the last time he'd ask about it. Toji had a knack for getting under your skin, and he wouldn't stop until he figured out what was making you smile.

[Evening - Dinner]

You decided to cook something simple, given that you were drained from the day's work. You scavenged through the fridge, finding some leftover vegetables, and settled on making some fried rice.

The scent of the frying filled the air, and Toji's attention shifted from the TV to the kitchen. "What's that? Smells pretty good."

You tried to ignore him, focusing on the cooking, but his persistence was wearing thin. "It's fried rice. Nothing fancy."

He stood, leaving the woman on the couch, and joined you in the kitchen. "Mind if I join you?"

You stayed quiet, focusing on stirring the rice. Toji watched in silence as you moved around the kitchen like a pro. He was surprised to see how skilled you were in the kitchen, and Toji ended up spending his time with you.

"Not bad for a Detective. You're surprisingly good at this." He commented, impressed.

You stiffened, not wanting to acknowledge his compliment. The truth was, you did learn a lot from Suguru. He used to tease you about your lack of cooking skills, and eventually, he took it upon himself to teach you. The smile that formed on your lips was subtle as you reminisce those memories with him, but Toji caught it.

"What are you smiling at?" Toji asked, narrowing his eyes at you.

You quickly wiped the smile away, shaking your head. "Nothing, just thinking about something."

"By the way, you seem to be enjoying yourself more with me than with whoever's waiting for you on the couch." You pointed out to the woman who was watching the television. You were quick to change the topic as you don't want him to probe you any further.

Toji glanced at the living room, remembering the woman. "Ah, shit. I forgot about her. Guess I was too engrossed in your cooking."

He walked back to the living room, calling out to the woman. "Hey, pretty! Let's continue this inside my bedroom, shall we?"

You could see the disappointment on her face, but she reluctantly followed him.

Once they were both out of sight, you turned back to the fried rice, muttering to yourself. "What's wrong with that guy?"

[27 minutes later...]

After dinner, you decided it might be best to clean up the couch. Toji's encounters usually left a mess, and you didn't want to deal with it later. You grabbed some disinfectant wipes and went to work, wiping down the cushions.

As you finished cleaning, you pulled out your phone and texted Suguru.

(SMS)

You : Hey, just finished dinner. Cleaning up now. Hope your view is still enjoyable.

You waited for a response while you put the wipes away. Moments later, you heard the ping of a message. 

Suguru: It is. I'm enjoying the peace and quiet. What did you have for dinner?

You: (smiling to yourself) Just cooked something simple, fried rice. I learned how to make it from a certain someone 🤭...

Suguru: (blushing) Fried rice 😳. I'm glad you still remember how to make it. It's our favorite!

You didn't want to dwell on the past, so you decided to change the subject.

You :  So, what are you up to right now? Still enjoying the view, or are you doing something else?

The conversation continued to flow, lighthearted and with respect. Neither of you mentioned anything about the past anymore. The mood remained comfortable and friendly.

In the middle of your texting, Suguru received a phone call. He looked at the name and sighed.

Suguru : Sorry, Y/N, someone's calling me right now. I need to take this. It's about another mission, and I'll probably need to finish this as soon as possible.

You: No worries. Just text me anytime! Be safe 🤗!

Suguru: Thank you. Take care, Y/N. I'll text you once I'm done. Good night 😊🌃

You: Good night, Suguru 😁...

(End)

You were lost in the conversation, when suddenly, you felt the presence of someone behind you. You were startled, whipping your head around to face Toji, who had a smirk plastered across his face.

"What the hell, Toji?!!!!" You hissed, quickly tucking your phone into your lap.

He settled into a seat beside you, his gaze fixed on you. "Just curious. Who's the lucky guy?"

You hesitated before replying, unsure whether or not to tell him. "Nobody! It's just a friend."

Toji snorted, clearly not buying your explanation. "Right. 'JUST A FRIEND.' I've been watching you all day. You had a smile on your face when you got home, while you were cooking, and even now. So, don't give me that crap."

He crossed his arms and leaned back, staring at you with a mix of irritation and curiosity. "If it's nobody, then why are you acting all coy?"

You gritted your teeth, wishing Toji would just drop it. But he was persistent, and you hated admitting anything to him.

"Fine... He's just a friend. A longtime friend to be exact. Now, can we please change the subject?" You demanded, trying to hide your annoyance.

Toji watched you with a puzzled expression, clearly not satisfied with your answer. He knew something was up, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it.

He thought about the way you smiled earlier, the way you chuckled to yourself while typing on your phone. It was unlike you, and it made him feel something he wasn't used to.

Jealousy, perhaps? He shook his head, dismissing the thought. He didn't care if you had a crush on someone or fuck someone. But seeing you happy brought up emotions he didn't want to deal with.

He decided to drop the subject for now, settling for watching whatever was on TV, pretending he wasn't bothered by your mysterious friend.

•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•

End Of Chapter 8 🥀....

@meowforluv @miizuzu

[ambrossart]

I know it’s been a bit since I’ve asked you about DWM, but something occurred to me today regarding this:

“What would Eddie think when he woke up and saw his bed empty? Would he think you left because you regretted staying? Would he think you were having second thoughts about him, about your relationship? Would he think you were being flighty and running away again?”

And as we know, Eddie did wake up alone because Wayne stopped Reader from going back. So did Eddie actually think these things before seeing Reader eating breakfast with his uncle? What kind of relief came over him upon seeing that she’d stayed?

I hope all is well 💗💗💗

I love how your mind works 🙃

I could see Eddie having an initial reaction similar to the Reader's. When he first wakes up alone in his bed, he would probably experience this sudden sense of overwhelming dread, thinking it had all been a cruel dream (because that would be just his luck, wouldn't it?). Then he would fully wake up, catch the faintest whiff of her shampoo or her perfume and realize last night actually happened, and he would feel instantly relieved... for about three seconds. Then he would wonder why she isn't in bed anymore and start to worry.

It wouldn't be an all-consuming, full-blown panic kind of worry, though. It would be more like an unpleasant nagging feeling. After all the progress they made the night before, Eddie would want to trust her completely, but still, he wouldn't be able to silence that part of him that remembers all the hurt he experienced before. And honestly, this would probably make him feel a little guilty because he doesn't want to keep holding onto that doubt.

So, yeah, those couple of minutes that Eddie's alone in his room would be a pretty stressful couple of minutes with a lot of conflicting emotions involved (plus he's still tired as hell because NO WAY that boy fell asleep right away with her in bed next to him 😂). Then he would hear the sounds of people in the kitchen and hope with all his precious little heart that she's out there. 🥺

And can you imagine how stupidly happy Eddie would be to see her eating breakfast at the table with Wayne? Knowing his uncle went out of his way to make her breakfast? It would be a dream come true for him.

Wow, it's been a while since I thought of DWM so thank you for that! It's been nice to turn my brain off for a bit, but I really miss that story. I need to come back to it soon and try not to put so much pressure on myself this time around. 😊

But I'm doing well! I'm getting married in less than 3 weeks, so I'm pretty excited about that. Hope all's going well with you, too ❤️

[ruminate88]

Mind Fudge 🫠

One minute I know for sure without a doubt Andrew was emotionally unavailable because he was a robot when I broke up with him. No emotions or tears given to me. I cried all night and dreamt of him all night and when I woke up, first thing I did was text him to ask if he’s okay and of course he replies with, “I’m fine. How about you?” 😳😭 I stupidly told him “no I was a zombie” and he was like “aww I’m sorry you need space today” like I did the breaking up but it truly felt like he did it. It felt like he did not care how upset I was… Emotional abuse is the only clarity I’ve been able to receive for all the confusion I had with Andrew.

Then there is this other part of my brain that wonders, “What if I’m misdiagnosing him?” And “What if there was just a lot of miscommunication and misunderstanding??” 😳😤😭 My brain hurts constantly going back and forward. My brain often won’t stop analyzing the past trying to make sense and the ONLY reasons I won’t reach out to Andrew and try to have honest conversations is: first off, he cheated and I had proof but he denied me my proof and accused me of catfishing him… Second, I lost trust once I knew he was capable of lying about cheating or hiding other girls behind my back. 3rd, I’m married now and it would very much deeply upset and hurt my new man if I tried to reach back out to Andrew. 😭 (I’m afraid to hurt my husband) I’m already feeling guilty about having this secret blog in the first place but I’m just trying to understand my feelings 😓

Daily and through the day my brain battles “Is Andrew truly emotionally unavailable and a manipulatior? OR was it miscommunication through texting and did I make a mistake breaking up with him?” But I can’t help to remind myself he already had a new gf he was posting about over the summer while telling me “I don’t know how to make things better, you just need time and space to get over me. Just stop texting me.” SO, I did stop texting him but theeeeeeeeen he started calling me but not saying anything… just listens to my voice 😰💔💔💔💔 Is that not low key weird and confusing?? That only further causes me to think he’s got a personality disorder OR he was missing me but I doubt that. I feel like he was just missing all the attention I was giving me.

I also can’t deny the times he was criticizing me after we broke up plus the constant stress dumping on me he did. Always being upset at me for his homework and family pressures. Trying to make me feel guilty for his problems but nothing I did or said made it better. He just would continue to complain to me but not actually he there for me when I wanted or needed him (one sided relationship) I mean there is MORE evidence pointing to a toxic and manipulative relationship than a healthy and loving one… BUT THEN I go back to “why wouldn’t he break up with me and why did he want more time to think it all over plus did I make the right choice dumping him cuz I didn’t want to but I thought he didn’t love me I mean, he cheated… that’s pretty much a sign you don’t love me.

Then I feel this huge disconnect in my new relationship and my brain won’t let up. It hyper focuses on Andrew ALLL THE FREAKIN TIME!!!!! I mean, I feel something is wrong with me and so I tell myself stop breaking down every word or action from him in the relationship and focus on your own problems and issues. GAH 😝😝😝😝

Plus I feel I have so much to process from Cody and Jake… ugh Jake is a nightmare I don’t wanna think of him 🥺🥺🥺 I only wanna think of Andrew and the love bombing cuz it felt so amazing but I realize it was prob fake and how am I 100% it was love bombing?? I mean, it appeared to be intense amount of attention and obsession he was giving me. He would wake up and text me good morning plus send me a Snapchat selfie from his shower also saying good morning and ask me if I slept okay… then Snapchat me all day off and on but other days not message me at all!!! he only acted super into me like that for the month of January then he was turning cold after that and leading up to January, our relationship seemed “luke warm” He didn’t seem hot or cold with me. was weird…. (Bread crumbing ??)

I get worn out waring in my head all the time 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯

[angelsfalling16]

Prompts? 👀

"What is it about me that isn't good enough?" for Snowbaz please 🥺

Sorry it took me so long to get this!! I have felt truly uninspired recently, but when I sat down to write this today, the words just started flowing out of me. I hope you like it!

This fits in with the 20 first kisses series, and I'll add it to that and put on ao3 later after I get home from work.

***

Baz

"What is it about me that isn't good enough?" Simon asks as he stumbles into our room in the late hours of night. I absolutely was not waiting up for him to see if he returned from wherever he ran off with the Mage to. I simply had an assignment that needed to be looked over before I turned it in tomorrow.

Simon looks terrible. There are dark circles under his eyes; his clothes are ripped and stained with a mix of dirt and blood; and there are numerous cuts along his exposed skin, one of which looks like it recently began to bleed again.

This is nothing new for him, but there is something about the look on his face. The light that is always on, giving him a determined look, is gone. The life seems to have gone from him, and all that is left is this golden empty shell that is slumped against our door, staring hollowly at nothing.

I stand from my desk and take a careful step towards him.

"Snow, are you alright?"

He keeps staring for a long, quiet moment, and I don't dare to move while I wait for him to respond.

"I just don't get it." His voice is barely above a whisper. "Nothing I do is ever good enough. All I'm good for is going off and blowing things up, but I can't even do that right."

Tears start to brim in his eyes, and I start to reach for him, stupidly thinking that I can comfort him, but I stop myself, worried that if I touch him, he will completely fall apart. I have never seen him like this.

"I have never been enough for anyone," he continues, his voice even quite now. If not for my vampire-enhanced hearing, I might not have even heard him. "My parents didn't event want me. Why would anyone else want me? I'll never be good enough for anyone." He ends on a sob, and the tears start to fall from his eyes, streaming down his face. He doesn't move to wipe them away. He just keeps staring blankly, like he isn't really looking at anything in the room.

I cannot begin to even imagine what happened to him tonight. He has gone on a lot of missions for the Mage, but none of them have caused him this much emotional pain. None of them have left him broken and crying in our room.

I don't know how to help him - or if I even can - but I have to do something.

I move closer to him, but I'm not sure that he notices that I'm in the room or registers the touch of my hand oh shoulder.

"Simon," I say gently. He turns his head towards me, but it's like he doesn't actually see me. "You are enough. You are more than enough."

"No, I'm not. No one cares about me."

I sigh and grit my teeth. Who the he'll did this to him? Who made him think that his life wasn't worth anything? If I ever find out, I will kill them.

"I care. I know it might not seem like, and I know that have never given you a reason to believe me, but I need you to know that you are enough for me."

His eyes seem to slowly come into while I'm talking, and as his eyes meet mine, I can see a glimpse of the light coming back, barely there but enough to give me hope that he can come back from whatever this is.

I slide my hand up from his shoulder to his neck, pausing briefly to feel his racing pulse, then up to his cheek. Simon leans into my touch and let's his eyes fall shut. If he was in his right mind, he wouldn't be trusting me like this. He never would have let me lay a hand on him without trying to at least fight me off.

"Baz," he whispers.

Matching him in volume, I say, "Snow."

He opens his eyes, and this time when he looks at me, even more of the light I'd back.  "You called me Simon before."

I shake my head at him but feel the corner of my mouth start to pull up.

"I meant want I said. I care about you, Simon."

He opens his mouth like he wants to argue but seems to change his mind and closes it again.

Careful to move slowly so as not to scare him off, I take another step towards him so that I can wrap my arm around him so that I can pull him closer, hugging him. I hold him gently, trying to show him without words that I truly do care for him. His legs seem to buckle, and I catch him, then lower us to the ground together so that I'm kneeling and he's half sitting in my lap, just letting me hold him.

I'm not sure how long we sit like that, but I can feel sleep about to pull me under when Simon sits up pulling away from me.

He doesn't say anything so I reach out to comb my fingers through his hair, simply because I can. Because he's letting me. The strands of his hair slip through my fingers like rays of sunlight, similar to the light that seems to be growing brighter in his eyes as he looks up at me.

"Simon," I whisper, my voice full of adoration.

"Baz," he replies, sitting up and wrapping his arms around my neck. He's holding me close, and I barely dare to breathe, not wanting to disturb this moment.

His eyes wander my face then stop at my mouth. I want to kiss him. I want to find a million ways to show him how deeply I care for him, and right now I want to do that by kissing him.

"Simon," I repeat, only this time it's more of a question.

He brings his eyes back up to mine and nods.

I smile at him briefly before closing the distance between us and pressing my lips to his.

His lips are warm and sweet and a little smoky, and as I press him to him, he presses back. He parts his lips against mine and deepens the kiss. I hold him tighter, and his warmth envelops me. Simon's embrace feels like a patch of sun shining in through a window, warming me up without burning me.

I'm still not sure what's going on with him, but with this one simple kiss, I have hope that he will let me help him get through it.